1.09

This is the new year, and I don't feel any different.

Mr. Gibbard, I dare to say that you have a point.

That past five days have been like something out of a dream. I've been wasted for most of them, but it's been a blur, none the less. Two of students of my class were killed this weekend. One was a suicide, one was a tragic accident. I'm coping, but I wish I could say the same for some of my other friends.
I went to California yesterday, and got back today. It was epic. Too much time with either of my best friends, esp. when you're stuck in a car for seven hours straight, but it was amazing regardless. The beaches were beautiful. I feel like I could have spent a week there, completely alone and been totally okay with myself. There's something so relieving about just going out on your own and doing something for you that spells out a-l-l g-r-o-w-n u-p. My childhood is leaving me so quickly. Which is nuts, 'cause I feel like I've experienced most of it over the past six months. I've grown a little bit of soul, and I think fits nicely among my layers.
I'm speaking with my father again. It's scary. I'm not completely sure how I feel about it yet, but I do know that it's easy. Comfortable, almost. But not all the way. Just a little.
Crazy enough, I had some anxiety about the trip to Newport. Ironically, we left on Josh's one year anniversary. That one of his death? Irony is, he died in a car accident on his way to California. It kind of scared the crap out of me a lot of the way there. I was just happy to be there by the end of the night.

That's enough for now :) Hope everyone else had a semi decent week.